The Danger of Divide and Conquer 

The Danger of Divide and Conquer 

We’re in a divide and conquer season right now. One of us handles bath time while the other does the dinner dishes. One feeds the baby while the other supervises room cleanup. One brushes hair while the other brushes teeth. (I’ll take the hair any day. Teeth brushing for firecracker two year olds could be used as a viable interrogation technique in my opinion.) 

Every day there are a hundred little tasks to complete, and with the age ours are they still need a lot of help with those tasks. So, much of our time is spent in divide and conquer mode. And while the efficient part of me loves this tactic because we move through our must-do list much faster, a bigger part of me sees a warning sign. Danger ahead. 

I think quality time is a myth. Marriages and families and friendships need time–period. Lots of time. It’s the bumping into each other while chasing kids and stolen glances while you get pelted with bath water and giving each other the look that says, “They’re almost in bed! Cue the Hallelujah chorus! And pass the Talenti!” Those are the moments we miss when we’re all divide and conquer. These are some hard days and some beautiful days all rolled into one, and when these days that seem so long but yet so short are over, there’s one person I want beside me. And I want to be so united, so woven together that it’s impossible to discern where one of us leaves off and the other begins. 

I’m okay with conquering less as long as we’re together. (And you handle the teeth brushing–wink, wink.)

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