Moms, why are we turning on each other? We are this tribe of strong, beautiful, unique, intelligent women, and we’re slaying and roasting our own. We should be the most connected, encouraging group in the world because–hello–we’re women. We go to the bathroom together. We talk about everything–and I do mean everything–together. We count down the days until the next Girls Night Out.
So, why do we turn on each other and start bashing each other’s decisions? C-section vs regular? Epidural vs drug-Free? Cloth diapers vs disposable? Breastfed vs formula fed? Paci vs no paci? Homemade baby food vs store-bought? Private school vs public school vs homeschool? Not to mention all the different options with discipline. And those are just from the first five years.
We get so caught up in these debates that we’ve lost touch with the gift we’ve been given. The gift of the village. Thank goodness God didn’t ask us to be mothers on an island. He gave us each other. He gave us a village. And He made us unique with a specific set of circumstances and a special way of living out our common calling–to parent these children to know and love God.
We all fall into this trap, but most of the time we’re very subtle–you might say passive-aggressive. It’s a little nod, a link to some article on Facebook and the phrase we’ve all said before, “I could never do that.” Maybe our heart is in the right place and we don’t say it out of malice, but let’s be a little more considerate. Because the truth is if God calls you to do something you absolutely CAN do it. And God calls each mom to different things, and we have to be okay that what God calls one mom to do He might not call another mom to do. Not everything is a right and wrong decision like we often make it out to be. Sometimes, it’s a listen to the Holy Spirit and find my best yes decision.
I’m ridiculously grateful for my best friend for a million different reasons, but one of them is that God has called us to make some different decisions as moms. And I love watching her be a mom because she is simply amazing. During our five years of parenting, I have seen that most of our struggles as moms are shared. There are a few unique to our particular situations, but the vast majority come just from being two imperfect moms trying to raise imperfect kids to love a perfect God and a broken world. As moms, we have so much more in common than we have different. But those differences don’t make us weaker. They make us stronger, more vibrant, more beautiful.
Instead of giving that look or posting that link or saying, “I could never do that,” let’s use that same amount of energy to encourage a mom today. Let’s use our words to build each other up instead of eating each other for dinner. I’m proud of you. Keep going. You can do it. You’re amazing. Our tribe of moms is pretty special. Let’s celebrate each other today.